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Coping with Pet Loss

By Maxine K.

“Bunnies we love don’t go away, they hop beside us every day, unseen, unheard, but always near, still loved, still missed and very dear.”

Anyone who has loved a house rabbit knows how intelligent, sensitive, and loving they are. Our rabbits are not “just pets”; they’re members of the family.

Sadly, their lives are tragically short in comparison to our own. The average lifespan of a rabbit is seven to ten years. No matter how well we care for and love them, sooner or later we all must confront their passing.

“Realize that you do not need anyone’s approval to mourn the loss of your pet, nor must you justify your feelings to anyone,” says Connecticut veterinarian Dr. Jeff Feinman on Homevet.com.

Intense grief over the loss of your bunny is a normal and natural response. Fortunately, there are many excellent resources available to help you work through their pain.

Stages and Waves of Grief

Grieving is a gradual process. Confusion, anger, guilt and depression are all common responses to the death of a beloved pet. Others find that grief is more cyclical, coming in waves, or a series of highs and lows.

There is no set timeline for healing. “Grief is our final expression of love, the last gift we have to offer. It isn’t to be rushed,” writes Moira Anderson Allen, author of Coping with Sorrow on the Loss of Your Pet.

Whether you grieve for weeks, months or years, be patient with yourself and allow the process to unfold. Ignoring your pain or “bottling it up” will only make it worse in the long run.

Work Through the Healing Process

Give yourself permission to grieve. Only you know what your bunny meant to you.

Find a way to memorialize your pet. This makes the loss real and helps you to get closure.

Eat right, exercise, and get plenty of rest.

Surround yourself with others who understand your loss. Take advantage of online support groups and rabbit forums for bereaved pet owners.

Learn all you can about the grief process. This will help you to see that what you are experiencing is normal.

Accept the feelings that come with grief. Give yourself permission to backslide. Holidays, smells, sounds, or certain words can trigger a relapse.

Consult a “Higher Power”, whatever that means for you.

Don’t be afraid to seek professional help if you need it. There are numerous pet loss counselors in the Washington, D.C. area who are specially trained to assist you in working through your pain. A list of resources is provided at the end of this article.

Take comfort in the fact that you gave your bunny a good life. Many rabbits die alone in hutches through neglect. Still others are set “free” only to die at the hands of predators.

Consider the Needs of Surviving Pets

Be careful not to neglect the needs of our other pets, particularly if your rabbit was part of a bonded pair.

In fact, grieving pets can show many symptoms identical to those experienced by the bereaved pet owner:

    • becoming restless, anxious, and depressed
    • having trouble sleeping or
    • refusing to eat.

Keep a normal routine, as much as possible.

Be attentive and loving–but try not to overdo it. Too much attention can contribute to separation anxiety.

Allow the surviving animals to work out the new dominance hierarchy themselves.

Don’t rush to get another pet to help the grieving pet(s) unless you are ready.

The decision of when to adopt a new rabbit is a very personal one. Your beloved bunny was unique and can never be “replaced.”

You will know when the time is right. Yes, you risk loss by loving again, but you know that the rewards are well worth it. And Friends of Rabbits will be here when you’re ready to adopt your new best friend.

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Edited by Frank D.